Turning 50 and Traveling Lite/Light

I approach this posting with tremendous gratitude for a life that so far has been filled with tremendous opportunity and blessings. As I approach 24 June 1959: twelve midnight, a half a century ago. WOW! It's more than I can wrap my brain around. A life that can best be described as a roller coaster ride of the Third Kind. I have seen tremendous highs and experienced lows that I thought I would never recover from. Yet, with God's amazing Grace and the kindness of Angels that the Universe has sent my way I approach this day wiser,stronger and a better human being. Be sure to checkout the video clips highlighted throughout this post.

In my youth, I never imagined myself living long. Maybe 50, 52 at the most. Who knows what the future holds. However, as I step into 50, I have a tremendous desire to live. I have (2) beautiful grandsons who I absolutely adore. It is my desire to see these boys grow to become exceptional men among men. I take one day at time, knowing that each day is another opportunity to witness Grace realized and another chance to get it right.

What I know for sure is that none of us gets out this life alive. I'm living every moment like it is absolutely Golden. I'm traveling lite. Leaving the baggage behind. Whomever has hurt me or I perceived has hurt me in their quest for self-actualization is forgiven in full as God has forgiven me. For those who I may have hurt with my actions or words, please know that hurt or harm was never my intention. One thing that I know for sure is that every person and event has the potential to serve my higher good if I let it. Turning 50 and traveling lite means just that. No baggage, (Bag Lady be gone) no pain. Just pure Joy. I know that there is only One Presence, One Power: God the Good, the Omnipotent, the Omniscient, the Omnipresent. Everything else is a manifestation of my own faulty thinking. My E.G.O. ( Easy God Out).

As I navigate through this 50th year, I want to be more selective in how I choose to use my time, talents and energy. Careful about the people I allow to occupy my time, energy and space. These days I live for Love Alone.

Though the essence of true unconditional love from that special man has not found me as yet, I give thanks for all the wonderful men who have come into my life and taught me so much. I'd like to give a special thanks to my former husband who gave me a wonder son who has went on to become my greatest teacher. (Love you Nico). A special thanks to the late, Reginald Renaldo Williams for guiding me through my mid-life journey. R.I.P., I love you baby. Mad props to the late Brother Jahti Jackson Maasai for showing me what a real warrior King looks like.

As I move forward... My desire is to listen more and talk less. I hope my life reflects a life that has been spent in service to others; especially our youth. Though my journey has not yielded a lot of material success, I thank God for a life well lived. A life spent in service to humanity and for the cause of social, economic and environmental justice. GREEN FOR ALL!!!

As I move forward it is my hope that I will continue to serve humanity and provide wisdom to the young. None of us gets out this journey alive. I'm going to ride this thing called life until the wheels fall off. In the meantime, I'm FABULOUS, 50 and traveling L.I.T.E. (Loving, Inspired, Tenacious and Enduring). Keeping the faith and sharing light and love.

Wishing you love and best Intentions, AkaziaJ (a.k.a. junee').

The Objectification of Black Women: From Michelle Obama to Lil' Kim

It has been a minute since I posted a blog. I have been listening more to what others have to say. I feel that being a good listener is critical to being a good writer. It was my hope that this post would be brief, however, I must say that when the Divine touches my pineal gland, thoughts and words rapidly flow to the tips of fingers and on to the keyboard. Let me begin by acknowledging that I am well aware that women in general are objectified and that black men are objectified as well. The focus here is on black women. I would also like to point out that black women have made significant strides in all areas; home, work and community. That said, sit back and take this ride with me.


Now I know many of you may immediately become alarmed that I am using Michelle Obama and Lil' Kim in the same sentence. However, we must give Lil' Kim her props, she brought it on DWTS. In fact, it was LK that inspired me to write this blog post. Lil' Kim played the Becky (White girl) role to the max. She had the language, the gestures and even the misty doe eyed Barbie look. Yet, in spite of this and the fact that she did a great job to have not had prior ballroom dancing experience, she was still reduced to raw sex appeal and the girl with the "bionic booty". Yes, Lil' Kim has in large part has been duplicitous in this objectification of black women, but we will speak to internalized oppression later.

From FLOTUS ( First Lady of the US) to Lil' Kim black women are seen as sexualized beings, rather than the complex, multifaceted human beings that we are. Even the FLOTUS, despite being Princeton and Harvard educated, a loving mother and devoted wife can not escape an obsession with her biceps and buttocks. Many would argue that the feminization of the first lady is a welcomed change from what usually happens with black women. While I too celebrate the fact that Michelle has chosen to focus on her role as loving wife and mother, I think the media in some way trivializes her role when they focus almost exclusively on what she's wearing and if she is showing her arms. By the way, loved CAC's (Commander and Chief) joke about the FLOTUS right to "bare arms".

Historically, black women have been objectified and dehumanized. Archetype female representations such as Jezebel, Sapphire and more recently compliments of "hip hop", stank hoe, chicken head, gold digger etc. It is true that white women are equally objectified, however, their images tend to be that of virtuous, pure and even slightly frigid, while black women have been portrayed as innately promiscuous, seductive, alluring or lewd.

One of the most heinous examples of the sexual objectification of black womanhood was seen in the 19th century with Saartjie Baartman, The Hottentot Venus. Put on display in a circus for her large buttocks and labia, the Hottentot Venus could not escape sexual objectification and humiliation even in death; her skeleton, genitals and and brain were placed on display in a Paris museum until 1974. Upon his election as president of SA in 1994, Nelson Mandela petitioned the French government to have her remains returned. Baartman was returned to her homeland of South Africa in 2002.

Women's suffragist, Sojourner Truth asked in the 19th century, "Ain't I a Woman". It was only recently that the works and deeds of this inspiring leader of women of all races was honored with a bust of her likeness that will be displayed at Emancipation Hall at our nation's capitol. It is also worth noting that it is the first image of a black woman to grace our nation's Capitol.

Venus and Serena Williams, the best in the world of tennis bar none in my humble opinion are constantly referred to by their brute force and of course Serena's ass. Seldom does anyone mention that these talented women are also entrepreneurs and are fluent in several languages. The most of what we hear aside from the physical/sexual presence is that they grew up on the mean streets of Crenshaw in LA.

To think that the first woman to win a best actress academy award was Halle Berry for Monsters Ball. Berry played a tricked out grief stricken, drug addicted mother, who look to Billy Bob Thornton to make her "feel good" in a very sexually explicit down right trashy sex scene. This is in no way intended to demean or minimize the talents of Ms. Berry, however, I argue this was not her best performance. But it fed into the historical stereotypes of black womanhood.

Sadly, the sexual objectification is most prevalent in some facets of hip hop music. Far too many music videos and rap lyrics are laced with misogynistic representations that further perpetuate negative stereotypes of black womanhood. As I stated earlier some black women have been duplicitous in this sexual objectification. Lil Kim along with fellow female rappers like Remy Ma and Foxy Brown to a name a few. These misguided young sisters believe that they are hip-hop feminists in that they are claiming their sexuality. Lil' Kim has so internalized her oppression at the hands of mainstream America as well as the world of hip-hop that she has mutilated herself with surgery and skin bleaching to the point that she is almost unrecognizable as her former self. LK and MJ could indeed be the poster children for self-hatred and internalized oppression.

Most recently, we see the talented Ciara in a music video with none other than I knew nothing about the "wardrobe malfunction" - Justice Timberlake. As black people have spent our whole life trying to break the chains of white oppression and now a black woman is allowing a white boy to sexually objectify her in her own video. You draw your own conclusion, check out the article and video Love, Sex and Magic . Not to appear to pick on Ciara, I must say that lady Beyonce' needs to balance her act as well. I have no objection to the celebration of the female black body in all it's beauty. All I'm saying is "Back That Thang Up".

While I strongly believe in personal responsibility, I must also acknowledge that white men still control the distribution of what we see and hear on the air ways. Nevertheless, as a community and one of the largest
U. S. consumer groups, we can collectively change our images by not buying or supporting products that demean our people as whole and our most priceless jewel, our women.

Well, as I rap up my latest rant, I close by simply saying, we've come a long way from the out house to the white house, and we've still got a long way to go.

African Americans in the Obama Administration: The Brown Paper Bag Test

Now I know with the state of the economy and US foreign policy there probably are a lot more important things I could be writing about. Well I figure there are enough bloggers out there to keep up on those issues. I've held off on writing this piece for about a month now. Yet, it still had a nagging presence and I just had to get it off my chest.

Has anyone else noticed that the hand full of African Americans Obama has selected for post within the administration, all pass the brown paper bag test. In case there might be one or two white people reading this or some black person who has really been sheltered, see the urban dictionary's definition of brown paper bag test. The long and short of it is , back in the olden days and maybe even today, if you were darker than a brown paper bag you were not considered an acceptable member of the black elite. Of course there were exceptions: Madame C. J. Walker, a self- made millionaire broke through the intra-racial color barrier. We all know enough money can get you pretty much anything you want. Remember Pele' bought himself white racial status in Brazil. The phenomenon is even present in Atlanta politics. Despite the fact the city has had a black mayor since the 1970's, there has never been a dark skinned mayor. Maynard Jackson, Andrew Young, Bill Campbell and Shirley Franklin all easily pass the brown paper bag test.

But back to the matter at hand. As I look at the African Americans that have been appointed to prominent positions; I'm not talking about the brother who shoots hoops and was his personal assistant on the campaign trail. I'm talking about the real movers and shakers. Let's run down the list: Eric Holder
(Attorney General), Melody Barnes (Domestic Policy Advis0r), Valerie Jarrett (White House Senior Advisor), Rob Nabors (OMB Director), Susan Rice (Foreign Policy Adviser), Lisa Jackson ( Director of EPA), Desiree Rogers (White House Social Secretary). All of these individual fall in to the category of light or at least brown skinned. Definitely passing the brown paper bag test. If I missed a Kwame Kilpatrick kind of dark skinned person please bring it to my attention.

I know by now you are yelling at me saying, "but his wife is dark skinned. Yeah that's right. He indeed selected a highly educated, chocolate sister with strong ties to the Chicago community, which certainly didn't hurt in giving him the "hood cred" he needed to build his political career on the Southside of Chicago. Which makes this seeming slight of more darker skinned African Americans for his cabinet even more disturbing. It can't be said that in 2009 dark skinned blacks aren't just as smart and educationally advanced as lighter skinned blacks. So what's up. Could this be a part of the post-racial, Obama era. Is it necessary that Obama appoint individuals to his cabinet who like him, are not perceived as threatening to white people as darker skinned blacks. Could it be that we are not as advanced as we would like to think. There were a lot a people who weren't feeling Michelle in the beginning. They wanted to paint her as the angry black women and anti-American. Now since she's the First Lady, they obsessed over her sleeveless arms and her taste in fashion: all but kissing her black ass.

Now I know many of your are saying that the light skinned/dark skinned debate is antiquated and reflects narrow thinking. In a perfect world where race and representation all shared an equal playing field, I would be in full agreement. However, there are studies that suggest that internalized racism is alive and well even in our children. Kiri Davis, a seventeen- year old film student demonstrated this in her "doll test" , the test was a recreation of the doll test performed in the 1950's by husband and white psychologist, Kenneth and Mamie Clark. The 2006 doll study had results that were similar to the 1950's study. The children thought the white dolls were prettier and preferred playing with the white dolls rather than the black dolls. A more recent ABC study done post-Obama shows the numbers closer and that a broader range of ethnicities.

Nevertheless, young children's views of power and beauty still seemed to be shaped by the perception that the white person is the person most likely to be in charge or to be rich. Our youth still believe that to excel academically or speak the King's English means you are "acting white". So in spite of Oprah, Obama, Ben Carson, Beyonce, and Jay Z, internalized racism still exists. What message does it send to our children who now believe they can become president, when they look at the staff of the Commander and Chief and there is not a single dark skinned face in the bunch. Am I jumping to conclusions? Being just plain petty, or could Obama actually be " color struck" to borrow a term from Zora Neal Hurston. I welcome your feedback.

Thoughts on Death and Dying

My last remaining blood elder pass away several months ago. She was my moms only sister. My mom passed away about 10 year ago. While of course it's always sad for the survivors for a love one to transition, the person is in a better place in every regard. And as we stand on the nadir of our economic and possibly social and moral epoch, I feel certain that Aunt Clay is in a better place.

They often say that weddings and funerals bring out the worst in family members; for this reason as a rule I attend neither weddings or funerals. Of course when it's a close relative it's kind of hard to avoid. The rest of my family made its way to B'ham and are prepared for the pomp and circumstance of a funeral. My Aunt has requested a grave side service. I don't what this means, but anyway. I waited for the roads to clear up because there had been horrible storms here in Atlanta and neighboring Alabama.

My dislike of funerals is rooted in my childhood when it seems I attend so many funerals of people that were really important in my life. It would always leave a deep sadness within me. The process itself seemed morbid. Of course as a young child I lacked the vocabulary to articulate my dislike for the process. More importantly, as a child, nobody gave a damn about what you might be feeling. You just went along with the process and kept whatever it was you were feeling safely locked within your inner sanctum.

I don't attend weddings for somewhat different reasons but in some ways the same reasons. I married at 19 and the wedding felt like a fairy tale. Of course there is always the day after and the day after that. I remember crying at my sisters wedding who married several years after I did. At first I attributed my tears to the fact that I was about 4 months pregnant at the time. Later I would realized that it was because I felt a profound sense of disappointment from my own experience, that a day that can start out so beautiful can go oh so wrong. Her fairy tale lasted much longer than mine, but the end result was still the same. The Prince eventually turned into a frog.

I digress. Back to the issue of death and dying. I have come to realize that the grieving process is a very selfish process. Instead of our viewing death as a natural progression of living those of us left view it as abandonment. We think mostly of ourselves. Our unfinished business with the person or our guilt that we didn't do more or that we didn't say all we wanted to say. Well thankfully, I have a very different idea. I try each day to show those who I profess to love, love in action. Now of course none of us can love the way folk think we should love. We can only love within our capacity. Some of us have a capacity so wide and consuming that it can literally suffocate the receiver. Others of us are so emotionally detached from our authentic feelings that it's almost impossible to love another person because we don't love ourselves. Of course there is another kind of person, who is so self-absorbed that it is difficult for the person to see beyond their own self interest and needs. All of us possess the potential to be any of these types. It's finding the balance that allows us to love healthy and be fully present for the object of our love without being over baring.

When I leave this earthly plane it is my desire that I sleep away quietly without fanfare and hopefully limited or no pain. I don't want a funeral or that those left behind to feel sorry for me and more important to feel sorry for themselves. I hope they will know that I lived a full life with plenty of laughter and joy. That I always saw the glass as half full no matter how difficult things got. That they will know that even as I breathe my last breath I visualized a world of laughter, dancing and love.

And so it is.

Black Love in the White House

In the absence of black love on movie screens, music videos and magazines, there is black love. At a time when it is more likely to find a real representation of a unicorn than black love, black love is in full effect in the most unlikely place: the White House. President Obama and his beautiful wife Michelle bring black love into full view for all to see. Many European Americans seem to think that black love has never existed. Their reference for black love or the absence of black love is framed by slavery and more recently the often misogynistic representations seen in rap music videos.

For those of us who still have memory of when momma and daddy loved each other, when daddy would give mom a kiss on the cheek or a pat on the rear as he went off to work, black love is not a novelty. However, for many African Americans and main stream America, the Cosby Show was the first glimpse of black love within families. Not since Cosby and Phylicia Rashad has there been such a positive representation of black love and relationships. The blessing is that, Mr. President and the first Lady are not characters on a TV screen. They are real people, who know the price one must pay to maintain family, profession and now the highest office in the land.

The first family offers the opportunity to deconstruct the view of black male/ female relationships and to transform the meaning and representation of black love. President Obama seems to have the ability to step outside his position of power and give props to the mother of his children and his life partner. The Obamas appear to have loved themselves beyond their respective Ivy League degrees, and career accomplishments to find a Love Supreme. This is indeed a revolutionary act.

President Obama and Mrs. Obama present a new vision of love, not just black love, but for all America. The first lady acknowledges that theirs is not a perfect marriage, but that they share a commitment to making it work. In photo after photo we see the Obamas with a look of love, respect and mutual admiration that is hard to fake. There is no doubt that there will be plenty of love and love making between the sheets at 1700 Pennsylvania Avenue for the next four years.


As the first family navigates its way through the next four or hopefully eight years, we must keep them in our prayers and intentions that their union will continue to grow stronger with each passing day and each new challenge, and that at the end of the Presidency, they will be more in love than ever. I dedicate this song by Oleta Adams to Mr. & Mrs. Obama. "Just Before I Go to Sleep".

There are many examples of black love all around us. We only need shut off the negative images of black relationships that bombard us and look around us to our parents, sisters and brothers and friends who have shared a union of black love for 25-50 years or more. Is black love easy, of course not; nothing worth having ever is. Yet if we are to rescue the souls of our children from consumerism, narcissism, and greed, love with be the healing balm that will re-unite and heal our families, our communities and our nation.

BLACK LOVE IN FULL EFFECT!

50th Virtual Birthday Bash!!!

Dear Friends:

I need your help in creating a world wide day of celebration for folk born June 24, 1959. We turn 50 this year. While sipping a little Chardonnay I thought what fun it would be to create a virtual birthday bash for people celebrating their 50th birthday this year around the world.

Using the power and reach of the Internet, all I ask is that you circulate this message among your many social and personal networks. Have folk email me and give their input as we Cancerians recognize a half century of loving, laughing and living. My goals is to create a network of folk who want to create a vision for our shared celebration.

Emails to: divagodd6@yahoo.com. Let's get this party started!!!

Etta James and Beyonce: No Fool Like and Old Fool

There's "no fool like an old fool" and "imitation is the highest form of flattery" are phrases I have heard throughout my childhood. However, I never thought it would be attached to some of the greatest icons of music. The most recent in this chain of fools appears to be the legendary singer Etta James (At Last). I thought someone was kidding when I first heard the blurb that she was threatening to "whip Beyonce's ass" and exclaiming that "the guy with the big ears was not her president". Etta were your meds not adjusted that day or did they take your common sense along with the pounds of fat from your weight loss surgery?

I'm baffled and a bit embarrassed in that I considered women like Etta James to be part of the generation that is suppose be the keepers of integrity, pride and common sense. James has joined the ranks of Aretha Franklin; you remember how she spewed hateration at Beyonce', who seemingly innocently referred to Tina Turner as the Queen on an awards show. Prior to that outburst, there was Jennifer Holiday hattin’ on Jennifer Hudson for singing " her song", I'm Not Going. Someone should make a video called "Old Divas Gone Wild", featuring Aretha Franklin, Jennifer Holiday and Etta James. Did I leave anyone out?

I challenge these ladies who clearly must be bitter as hell despite the fact that they are respected and revered by people around the world. Nobody can sing R.E.S.P.E.C.T. like the Queen of Soul, but that doesn't mean it isn't room on the throne for other Queens. Etta, Aretha and Jennifer Holiday get over yourselves. I only hope that Beyonce’ and the youngins’ will take a lesson from all this. They live in a time when they don't have the luxury of being the "it girl" for 15 or 20 years. In today's fast pace, short memory society you're the "it girl in the morning and Rhinanna has replaced you by the afternoon. If you notice, there is a new King or Queen of Hip-Hop every year. Luckily these young people understand the nature of the game. They either step aside or keep raising the bar so that who ever steps up to take their reign will have to bring it. They invoke a "ride a die" attitude to their craft that I applaud. Now don't get me wrong, they have their share of beefs between artists, however, it's usually more about creating hype to sell more records than anything else.

As for the "old fools" who let all of their stuff show (sometimes literally... ReeRee). I ask you to take a lesson from the "Timeless" Miss. Patti LaBelle. Though forever and a day, I will always think of LaBelle when I hear Lady Mamalade, Miss.Patti was not only the epitome of class and grace when Christina Aguilera, Little Kim and Mya performed the song in what I think was one of the worst musicals I've ever watched, Moulin Rouge. (Please note that my feelings about the movie are not a reflection on the performance of Aguilera, Little Kim and Mya). Miss. LaBelle applauded the sisters and encouraged them to keep up the good work and carry on the legacy. The love that the hip- hop generation has for Miss. LaBelle was recently displayed at the UNCF Parade of Stars- Salute to Patti LaBelle. In addition to Fantasia, singers like Chrisette Michelle, and Jennifer Hudson performed musical tributes to Patti LaBelle and had nothing but praise for the example that she has set with her music, but more important, with her generosity and willingness to mentor and cook for up and coming entertainers both male and female. LaBelle seems to always try to take the high road. In a recent interview she was asked why she didn't sing at any of President Obama's inauguration events, she graciously replied, she was not invited to perform, but gave mad props to Aretha Franklin for her performance.

I call upon Etta James, Aretha Franklin and Jennifer Holiday, who all clearly got caught up in the moment, to not allow their historical legacies to be tainted by a moment when they allowed the worst parts of themselves to show, rather than being a reflection of the Divine gifts to the world that they were born to be.

Imitation may be the highest form of flattery, but truly, there is no fool like an old fool.